Spencer and I met the idea of an ‘espresso challenge’ with a combination of bemusement and concern. As a reformed coffee addict trying to maintain a low-caffeine lifestyle, I formed the apprehensive half of our taste team, meanwhile with coffee practically running through his veins, the dishevelled Mr Douglass took a much more nonchalant stance.

Our aim would be simple, visit a range of cafes and restaurants across SoHo, enjoy the same coffee in each and determine the most palatable cup of roasted russet in town, whilst trying in earnest to remain hydrated and able-minded.

In the run up to an article focused entirely on espresso tasting, it was my wilful intention to consume more water and electrolytes than humanly possible. I’m not a morning person. Loath as I am to reference such an uninspired statement I can do nothing but personify it’s meaning. As is often the case, I began the espresso challenge day with a fairly robust soy latte. Schoolboy error. Starting the day on what was surely a bad foot, I met with Spencer in the early hours of the afternoon in a cosy café slightly North of Hollywood Road, Graze Bistro.

“What say we start with an espresso right here?” chimed Spencer, with the cocksure swagger of a beardy caffeine fiend. “I know this espresso well and it’ll serve as a great platform for our taste buds.” Our diminutive cups arrive promptly, hot and positively burning with aroma.

Both Spencer and I have noteworthy barista experience and immediately our eyes light up as we glance down at our beverages. Obscuring our view of the liquid is a foamy reddish-brown substance called crema. The telltale sign of a good espresso, this crema sits thick, rich and glossy atop the liquid. Adding our own absurdly specific measurements of brown sugar to each cup, we’re both pleased with the crema’s ability to support the sweetener, another trait of a well-made espresso. With a quick stir, gentle enough to leave the crema unaffected but with enough purpose to empower the sugar, we swiftly gulp the drinks down and our taste test has begun.

As an outsider to SoHo, we disregard the Graze espresso from this makeshift competition, save its use as a base, a thoroughly enjoyable espresso that will help us to recognise both the good and bad to follow.

A quick taxi journey and an earful of obscure coffee-related factoids from the Spencer, finds us in the centre of SoHo, escalating gently. Speaking with the haste of a man without a need for oxygen, Spencer’s monologue continues “I often find the best coffee in the most unexpected of places, like little bakery-type affairs, rather than high-end cafes, don’t you?” The man asks a lot of questions. Fortune favours me as The Real Bread Company sidles into view. Spotting ‘Morning Coffee’ emblazoned across a well-placed chalkboard, we disembark the escalator and stroll in. I opt for a single Espresso, Spencer a double, breathlessly providing another fact “You should never order a single espresso, a perfect single requires fifty percent wastage, as it has to be poured as a double.” I already know this; he continues “...a lot of places will save on cost and just pour the single amount, leaving you with a bitter espresso.” 

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